What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

My landlord just sold the house I’m renting from her. She included all fixtures, that I bought and installed. Does she have this right?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What advice would you give to a father of a teenage daughter on how to protect her from boys, dating, and social media? How should fathers discuss these topics with their daughters?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Why does poop smell bad?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

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Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

TEXT:

Why can't ugly women date hot guys? I know a woman who wants a hot BF but people would just laugh at her and ask her "what can you bring to the table for him?", isn't that messed up?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

I caught my neighbor leaving his 12-year-old son home alone and he has not come back in 6 hours. Should I call CPS?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

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Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What are women's true thoughts and feelings on bestiality?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Make Nazis afraid again!

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

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¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

How do I get off Paxil?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

How did you as a human being change while growing up?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!